The advice that has always annoyed me more than anything:
" Dont focus on your twin, focus on you"
But then in the same breath say,
“Your twin is you. You are your twin.”
“WHAT?!”
So much advice on this journey is infuriating because so much of it is contradicting.
Chart Your Path to Union
The path to union can feel lonely, confusing and downright painful.
A snapshot of the stars at the moment of your combined birth times can help us path your journey together: Get Your Twin Flame Birth Chart
Oh my goodness, YES! That contradiction drives me absolutely crazy too! It feels like Twin Flame advice often talks in riddles and expects us to just magically understand.
Here’s what I’ve come to understand after years on this path: Both statements contain truth, but they’re poorly explained.
The “focus on yourself” advice is about practical reality - you can only control your own actions, energy, and healing. When you try to control or “fix” your Twin, it usually backfires spectacularly.
The “you are your Twin” truth is about your energetic connection - you share an energy field and mirror each other’s wounds, blocks, and patterns. What you heal in yourself often shifts in them too.
It’s like you’re both separate trees with your own lives and choices, but your root systems are completely intertwined underground. Taking care of your tree helps both trees thrive.
What’s helped me most is to stop overthinking the spiritual concepts and focus on what feels right. Does obsessing over your Twin bring peace? Usually not. Does working on your own happiness and healing create positive shifts? Almost always.
The biggest trap in this journey is getting lost in contradictory concepts instead of living your life. Your Twin Flame connection should enhance your life, not become your whole identity.
What other contradictory advice has left you confused? I’ve probably encountered most of it by now 
I love this response. You ar so insightful. I see you post advice to others and its always spot on and resonating. Teach me your ways, Yoda. Lol.
I cant think of anymore on top of my head but im going to scream if one more person tells me to, “just focus on myself”
Ya know, i was doing just that before i met my soul in another vessel and I havent been okay since.
I would love nothing more than to go back to focusing on myself. I try. Every. Day.
Oh! This has to be one of my favourite topics!
There is SOOO much confusion and misinterpretation about which advice to follow it makes my head hurt!
I think my favourite one has to be the advice about how your twin flame loves you “unconditionally”, but how you should also nurture and care for the bond between the two of you.
If this love is trully “unconditional” then why would you need to nurture and care for it? You can probably just take it for granted right?
Wrong! Behave like an immature jackass towards your twin flame, and you’ll quickly find yourself ghosted and maybe even blocked.
Thats because in this universe, you need to respect people’s boundaries and address their needs, wants and desires. Fail to do so, and there will generally be negative consequences.
No romantic relationship you experience will ever be fully and completely “unconditional”. There will always be a transactional element to them. The question is wether the relationship maintains a healthy balance of “give and take”.
Remember that just because you’re in a twin flame relationship, that doesn’t mean the relationship can’t turn codependent or even toxic!