I had previously posted how my twin just left me three weeks ago. I worked through it and really thought I had reached a place spiritually I have never been before. I saw so many signs telling me I had completed this very very hard cycle. I saw signs that he would realize what he had done and would reach out soon. I even opened the door of a car I just bought and on the floor of the driver side was a small grey and white feather. To me the signs were almost unmistakable. I picked myself up and let him go knowing it wouldn’t be long before we were together again. Then I get this reading yesterday telling me I have so much work left to do and I should probably start dating. I cried through the entire reading. It was as if everything I thought I had achieved just still wasn’t enough. Dating? I don’t know how to be in love with someone and date other men at the same time. It’s just not in my dna. So I woke up this morning and sent him an email. My closure since none would be given from him. I was kind and loving. I told him I was letting him go. That I love being in a relationship and even though this didn’t work out. I wasn’t going to give up on that. I was going to start dating again. I told him how much he hurt me and that I forgive him and I wasn’t angry. I have tried my hardest. I have worked on myself non stop for a year and a half only to end in failure and pain. I never thought I would say this, but Im done now. I can’t take one more second of this agony. At least I am a better, actually a much better person for it. I truly thought he was my happily ever after. Now I just pray that God will harden my heart so I at least have a chance to find love with someone else.
Congratulations on your new vehicle purchase!! 
From the time I started being aware of the concept of Twin Flames, until now. I think I have been on this journey for about a year or so. And personally I cannot count the numbers of times I have felt like how you are feeling now. I tried moving on, forgetting, letting go, releasing, and even dating other people. But where I am now, I realize that it is all a part of the ebbs and flows of this journey.
I’m sure you and I are not the only ones who have wanted to throw in the towel, I have begged the universe/the source/God to make me forget, screamed “Why me? Why this? Why him?”, cried into my pillow because nothing would soothe the ache, welled up when songs that reminded me of him would randomly play at the strangest moments of my day, fell to my knees when the pain was the most unbearable. I question why did this have to come to pass when I was perfectly happy in my blissful ignorance. Before I became aware of what Twin Flames were, my life was not perfect, but I was happy.
This awakening shakes up your entire belief system, makes you more aware and in tune with the language of the universe, and most importantly, yourself. Despite all the pain I have gone through, and still continue to feel some days, I am thankful for this journey because it has made me see how beautiful the world can be, and how much I need to learn to heal my wounds and truly 100% without a shadow of a doubt love myself. The personal battles I’ve struggled with for years slowly came to the surface and forced me to confront my inner demons. And even though there are days when I feel like. I’ve done so much healing! Where is my reward, Universe?! In my mind I imagine myself to be like a little toddler throwing my toys around the room in frustration. Something always happens to remind me how much more work I have to do on myself. It’s not just about saying it out loud, but truly truly truly believing it down to your gut.
If your decision is to try to date, if that is what your gut is telling you, then explore the possibility. But don’t do it because it is what a tarot reader or a reading has advised you to do. Readings etc do bring a source of comfort and perspective, but ultimately, it is up to your own free will what path you chose to take.
The best things in life take time. Just because in winter, the trees are bare, doesn’t mean that the roots aren’t alive and flowers won’t bloom come spring. That’s the other thing this journey has taught me: Patience. Conviction. Unconditional love.
No matter how you decide to proceed, I wish you nothing but peace and happiness. If you ever need to talk, I would be happy to listen.
Thank you 
I needed to hear that
That was very well said. I’m almost 3 years in now and I’m at this “dedicated yet detached” phase. We’re in separation but text occasionally, maybe 5 times a year. We know we would be there for each other, if needed, but we have to stay out of each other’s daily lives, for now. We could see other people, we’re broken up, but that’s not the path either of us has chosen. I used to get all riled up after we spoke, like… Is this happening now? Has he finally come to his senses? What do I do next? Etc. Now I’m at a place of peace. After we speak, I smile, grateful for our time and go on with my day. This may sound crazy, but enjoy your time in separation, because it’s YOUR time.
It’s been ten days since I got the go date reading. I sent him an email after my tears dried up. I told him I forgive him. I told him I was going to move on and start dating again. It was the most cathartic thing I have ever written. The peace I had after was amazing. I even went on a dating site. I have gotten way more from this relationship than just a broken heart. I asked myself would I trade all this growth to be with him? my answer was a resounding no. I am leaving with much more than I started with. I am thankful. l know there are many blessings waiting for me. I am finally ready to receive them all.
If I could I would take everyone’s pain just to give you all the relief I long for. At least that way others could finally get some relief from all of this. I have done all the work I needed to do. This is my time to receive all the blessings I have earned. I know that and Im grateful. I am ready for the love I want and I know it might not be him at this point. Im making my peace with that and opening myself up to new opportunities. The thing is, I feel like it’s going to be a consolation prize since it seems impossible for me to feel the same way about someone else.
You seem compelled to go down this path of openness to new experiences. You never know where this may lead. You may go on a date and discover you love ballroom dancing, deep sea fishing, sculpting……who knows what. It feels like this is a search for your passion. Kind of, getting your mojo back. If you want joy in your life, discover what brings you joy. We can’t depend on some other person to fulfill our lives. Chase your dreams, follow your passions and live a life well lived. While you’re busy being the best version of yourself, you’ll attract the person that can meet you where you’re at.
I just can’t wrap my head around how wrong I was about everything.
I am not compelled to do anything. I am left without a choice. I am surrounded by love. I know that. I couldn’t be more blessed to have such loving people in my life. I am absolutely not choosing anyone or anything over my twin. He has left me with one choice. Me over him. I can’t spend anymore time in this pain. It is literally killing me inside. So my only choice is myself. I fucking hate him. I mean it didn’t have to be this hard. I have a date with a man I know on October 25th. That will be the end for me. I can’t be with one person while my heart longs for another so after that day I will be done in a way I can’t turn back from and that is ripping my heart out.